It’s strange getting to know people in your thirties. With 30, 40, or 50 years under your belt there is a lot of history to catch up on when learning about a new friend. Basic questions like “What do you for a living?” or “Where did you grow up?” can give you clues, but they are only pieces of a broader story.

My family moved to a new church a year and a half ago and immediately joined a life group (home group, small group, Bible study, or whatever you want to call it). The group fit our schedule and had cool people we wanted to get to know better.

I love talking with the ladies in my group, but most of our conversations cover spiritual topics and praying for one another. We don’t know each other’s history very well, but these ladies can pray deep and speak a word of encouragement to you that cuts you to the core. I know these ladies will help me in anything I need, but I still wanted to get to know them better.


Last week the ladies and I all gathered at a friend’s home to devour tapas style food and desserts. While we ate I laid out some homemade conversation cards to spark conversation. I wanted questions that weren’t deep to keep the conversation light. I also didn’t want to focus our discussion on our husbands or kids.

I think there’s value in honoring a woman beyond listing the many hats she wears. Of course, a woman with children will never take off her “mother hat,” but being a mother isn’t the only thing that makes her unique. I wanted to know what made us unique.

As the conversations went along we heard a story about a family’s wild adventure involving skydiving that brought us to tears. We learned that two ladies both played the french horn in high school and we laughed over the silly things we watch on television. We all left that night knowing more about each other and had a great time. The evening was a success!

One of the ladies asked for a list of the questions I used so I decided to post them here and share them with y’all.


25 Conversation Starter Questions

You can go as Pinterest-y as you want in making the conversation cards and be creative in how you get the group to answer the questions.

I had some old cardstock and a calligraphy marker from that one time I created a scrapbook. I don’t have a printer, so I quickly wrote them by hand and no one seemed to mind they weren’t fancy. I folded them in half and placed them standing up in the center of the table. We each took turns drawing a card. The person who drew the card had to answer first, then everyone else has to answer the same question.

  1. What are some of your guilty pleasure books, TV shows, or movies?
  2. What is the most spontaneous thing you’ve ever done?
  3. Describe a pet peeve or one of your quirks.
  4. If you could do another profession what would it be and why?
  5. Name 3 of your favorite movies.
  6. What is the best this you can cook or bake?
  7. Describe a perfect day either in reality or fantasy.
  8. What extracurricular activities did you do in high school?
  9. If you got a tattoo, what kind would you get and where would you put it?
  10. Have you ever met a famous person? If so, when and where?
  11. Tell a story about one of your scars.
  12. What is your current favorite song and why?
  13. What was one of your favorite books as a child or teenager?
  14. What actress would you want to play you in a movie about your life?
  15. What would you like to do for someone else if you had the money and time?
  16. Can you do a stupid human trick?
  17. If time and money weren’t a problem, what hobby would you like to pick up?
  18. When you have a random hour of free time, what do you usually do?
  19. If you had to be someone else for one day, who would you be and why?
  20. What are you most excited about in your life right now?
  21. What is your favorite smell?
  22. If you could choose one book as a mandatory read for all high school students, which book would you choose?
  23. If you had a robot helper helper, what one task would you most like them to do for you?
  24. If you could hop on a plane tomorrow and go anywhere where would you go?
  25. If you were an ice cream flavor, what flavor would you be and why?

The questions are meant to be silly and light, but they can also bring up a difficult piece of our past unexpectedly. You never know how the conversation will turn out. These questions can help get the party going and the stories flowing. We all have a story.

What question would you add to this list? What question would you most like to answer? How would you make conversation cards and present them?